by Helena Fox (Author)
A Kirkus Reviews Best Book of the Year
A Chicago Public Library Best of the Best of the Year
"Profoundly moving . . . Will take your breath away." --Kathleen Glasgow, author of Girl in Pieces
A stunningly gorgeous and deeply hopeful portrayal of living with mental illness and grief, from an exceptional new voice.
Biz knows how to float. She has her people, her posse, her mom and the twins. She has Grace. And she has her dad, who tells her about the little kid she was, and who shouldn't be here but is. So Biz doesn't tell anyone anything. Not about her dark, runaway thoughts, not about kissing Grace or noticing Jasper, the new boy. And she doesn't tell anyone about her dad. Because her dad died when she was seven. And Biz knows how to float, right there on the surface--normal okay regular fine.
But after what happens on the beach--first in the ocean, and then in the sand--the tethers that hold Biz steady come undone. Dad disappears and, with him, all comfort. It might be easier, better, sweeter to float all the way away? Or maybe stay a little longer, find her father, bring him back to her. Or maybe--maybe maybe maybe--there's a third way Biz just can't see yet.
Debut author Helena Fox tells a story about love and grief, about inter-generational mental illness, and how living with it is both a bridge to someone loved and lost and, also, a chasm. She explores the hard and beautiful places loss can take us, and honors those who hold us tightly when the current wants to tug us out to sea.
"Give this to all [your] friends immediately." --Cosmopolitan.com
"I haven't been so dazzled by a YA in ages." --Jandy Nelson, author of I'll Give You the Sun (via SLJ)
"Mesmerizing and timely." --Bustle"Nothing short of exquisite.
" --PopSugar"Immensely satisfying" --Girls' Life
* "Lyrical and profoundly affecting." --Kirkus (starred review)
* "Masterful...Just beautiful." --Booklist (starred review)
* "Intimate...Unexpected." --PW (starred review)
* "Fox writes with superb understanding and tenderness." --BCCB (starred review)
* "Frank [and] beautifully crafted." --BookPage (starred review)
"Deeply moving...A story of hope." --Common Sense Media
"This book will explode you into atoms." --Margo Lanagan, author of Tender Morsels
"Helena Fox's novel delivers. Read it." --Cath Crowley, author of Words in Deep Blue
"This is not a book; it is a work of art." --Kerry Kletter, author of The First Time She Drowned
"Perfect...Readers will be deeply moved." --Books+Publishing
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Set in Wollongong, Australia, Fox's exquisite debut offers an intimate portrayal of a teenager navigating familial and social complexities while living with an undiagnosed mental illness. Biz, 17, blames herself for her father's death when she was seven ("I am why he was sad"), and she doesn't tell anyone that he remains a visible, often comforting presence in her life. Biz has her posse of friends, including her best friend Grace, whom she once kissed, and who supports Biz as she begins to explore her sexual identity. But a drunken beach party incident leads to her dramatic expulsion from the group and catapults her into suicidal depression. Biz drops out of school, begins clinical treatment, and makes unexpected new friends, including Jasper, a teen with challenges of his own. However, her ongoing hallucinations, panic attacks, and disassociations, in which she has no memory of incidents others report, leave her increasingly perplexed about her experiences, until she reaches a crisis point. Through lyrical first-person narration, Fox empathically conveys the hereditary nature of Biz's illness, its disorienting manifestations, and the limitations and power of love to heal. Ages 14-up. Agent: Catherine Drayton, InkWell Management. (May)
Copyright 2019 Publishers Weekly, LLC Used with permission.Gr 9 Up--Biz's father died when she was young, and her grief hasn't let up, but he visits her to tell stories about the past, so he isn't really gone. Other things talk to her, too, such as the ocean, which she wades into while drunk and nearly drowns before the new kid, Jasper, pulls her out. After a few bad turns, she loses the group of friends she exists on the fringes of, including her best friend, and drops out of school. But then she loses her dad--again--and it's too much. She sets out on the road to find him, Jasper by her side, taking photographs of places that were important to her dad, who speaks to her through them. Through much of the story, it feels as though her father might be appearing and nonsentient objects may be talking through magical realism rather than hallucination, but as she pulls further from reality and ends up in the hospital, her dissociation becomes obvious. The lack of clarity between what's real and what isn't might be confusing, but it captures the experience of not being able to tell the difference. The grief, depression, and intrusive thoughts Biz endures are raw, but there is a healthy distance between her experience of events and readers'. This portrayal of mental illness is honest and authentic, including Biz's recovery. VERDICT For collections that need to expand their mental health offerings.--Alex Graves, Manchester City Library, NH
Copyright 2019 School Library Journal, LLC Used with permission.